Ok, Facebook, here’s the idea.
Breaking up in the time of facebook is really, really hard. And I know you’re always looking for more ways to make money, since ads might not be doing enough for you. In my time of need I thought something up for you!
When we break up with someone who happens to be on facebook (everyone basically), you offer a “breakup package” for like $1.99 or something. It would include the following options that we could pick and choose from:
- Block the name. As in, we see zero posts or pictures that has our exes name in it.
- Use your face-recognition technology to block any pictures with the ex tagged in it. That way we don’t have to block all our friends in common just to avoid this from happening.
- When we “breakup” with this person, it’s “silent” on the news feed. It took me an hour to figure out how to hide the facebook breakup news last time I did it.
- If my ex has RSVPed to an event already, that event gets blocked from my news feed. I don’t want to go if he’s there, so just don’t tell me about it.
- Automatically untag or delete all pictures that include our ex in our photo albums.
That’s all the ideas I’ve got for it. Facebook, whaddya say?